A February love that lasts forever
It’s that time of year again when the supermarkets are flooded in a river of red roses. You can’t find a decent birthday card because they have filled the rack with pink and flowery Valentine cards. When we think of the month of February, apart from the grim weather conditions, we tend to think of Valentine’s Day. It provides a warm glow in an otherwise grey and gloomy month. By the time you read this blog though, it will most probably be all over and exchanged with Easter cards and eggs but it still gets us (or some of us) into a frenzy of buying stupid fluffy stuff to express our love to one another.
Interestingly, this year (2024) Valentines falls on Ash Wednesday - or more commonly known as the beginning of Lent. This is a time of giving up something or abstaining or fasting from certain foods. It’s also meant to be a time of sacrificing a habit, we dearly want to hold onto, for 40 days leading up to Easter. More recently, it’s been suggested we actually start something that will help someone else - a more thoughtful, outward looking form of giving.
Valentines, however has always been an opportunity for us to express our romantic, Eros love towards someone we fancy and hope they feel the same way. That is why cards often say..’will you be my Valentine?’. When I was at school, we had ‘secret valentines’ who would leave a card on our desk and not sign their names. You were left wondering, excitedly who fancied you! Of course, married couples, and those couples who have been together a while also make use of Valentine’s Day to show how much their loved one means to them by giving a card, flowers and chocolates etc. But, it is only a day.
Can our February love last forever? Giving flowers, cards and chocolates etc is great but personally I wouldn’t want that every time my husband told me he loved me. I believe, even if your love language was gifts, it would seem a very superficial love because as humans we are innately selfish and those things that really matter - being listened to, being supported, being helped, being respected, are the expressions that tell you, you are loved.
Why did I mention Lent? Oh yes, it’s a time of sacrificing our comforts in order to focus our mind on someone else - Jesus predominantly. (He fasted for 40 days and ultimately gave himself up for us- He expressed his love through sacrifice).
Real love is not an Eros love with cards, chocolates and flowers but an Agape love. A sacrificial love - being there for our spouses, partners, boyfriend and girlfriend when we’d rather be somewhere else; doing those uncomfortable chores; not arguing back and being defensive but being kind and understanding; doing something out of your comfort zone for them.
Like Lent, let Valentines or the month of February be a catalyst for upgrading your expressions of love for the year ahead - not just for one day!
